I have not written in the past month or so because I have been working my first month as a 5th-grade teacher. It is good work, joyful even, but tiring and seemingly all-consuming. Rarely have I had time to think of much outside of how I’m going to make sure these 10 year olds are safe and learning. But this Sunday, I breathe. In fact, I am finding that as each Sunday comes and my God welcomes me to His time in Sabbath, He has something for me. When the week falls away and the new one arises, the constancy of this holy day returns me to center.
Though I am still learning how to do the work before me, I have perspective to feel that learning to be a little less desperate. I am repeatedly invited to the experience of being both a shepherd and a sheep. In the language of Nouwen’s Return of the Prodigal Son, I am beckoned to be both a son and a father. I sit at the foot of the cross at the close of Holy Eucharist and am asked to feed the Lord’s sheep as He has fed me. I am keenly aware of my weakness and almost equally aware of the need to be strong for a gaggle of blessed children. So, as I take a breath this Sabbath day, I rejoice that I have time and energy to write.
My aunt and uncle gave me a copy of Every Moment Holy for my birthday, and I was inspired to engage with an increasingly familiar experience through writing in the style of the book. Below is “A Liturgy for Receiving Bad News as a Teacher,” written as a way to call on God’s help when I come up against challenges in a student’s life that are too large for them or me to bear. Sometimes, kids have challenges in their lives that need for me to bring out the big guns. The big guns, of course, being our eternal creator.
“A Liturgy for Receiving Bad News as a Teacher”
Most merciful God—
You, who saw Hagar in the wilderness
Who sees every mother’s child now—
Have mercy upon your children.
To those who cannot control the homes that they live in;
Who seek to impress the wrong people
Who fall prey to bad influences
Who are taught to fight so that they may not be taken advantage of
Bring justice, oh Father.
To those who do not have the skills to choose
Reasoned responses to hardship
Peaceful reactions to unkindness
Or perseverance when challenges arise
Show grace, oh Father.
To those who have missed so much school
And have not enough hours in the day to catch up
Discouraged and unsure
If they are smart enough for this
Bring comfort, oh Father.
Those who do not understand the words around them
Spoken in a language foreign to them
Acting loudly
Because actions speak when words can’t
Hear them, oh Father.
And for me
The teacher
Your child
Give me the strength to feed your sheep
Patience to listen before acting
Grace to help and never judge
And hope to believe that you will make right all things
Open my eyes that I may see
Your glory in those you have created.
That I may serve you in obedience
As your humble child.
Through the power of the Holy Spirit,
Amen.
The Big Idea 